How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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