Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Randomize
