Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize