Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
