you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
i've created a new STD.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
