You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
