Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
