I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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