I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
