Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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