On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize