i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
