You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
