Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
