so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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