their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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