Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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