is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
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