Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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