Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
