From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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