is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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