hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize