Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
