And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
