Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I party with great urgency now.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
