i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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