just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
