Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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