Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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