can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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