Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
