i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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