nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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