I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just gift wrapped bread.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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