No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Someone came in the potted fern
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
