Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
