wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
