Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
