tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
im holly from the hills drunk
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just gargled with NyQuil
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
