I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
