To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize