Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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