My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
