She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
