everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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