I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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