And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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