well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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