it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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