Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
