i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
