problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Randomize
